Ode To A Warm Shower

I didn't realise how much I'd missed you dearest,
I've endured an ice age to find you,
Here in this unassuming grubby little room,
Waiting, unlikely temptress, can it be you?
These weeks past hope has faded with your memory,
Unloving, the touch of alien harlots has chilled my skin,

'Till now. 

Tentative at first, but sweeter than ever I remember,
Your caress envelops, warm, unbridled joy,
A cuddle that takes me home.

You whisper something... a spiteful cough in my ear...

AAHHRGGH The bloody thing's stopped! How am I supposed to get this f***ing shampoo out my hair?!?!